Lacking Motivation

Here I am sitting at my computer typing this post when I should be at my old school packing up so I can move all my teaching crap that I won't be able to use in my new position to my new school, which I have never been to, and frankly at this point wish I would never see! I am having such a hard time getting into the right frame of mind to start this new job. I just want to go back to my old school with all of my friends there instead of being the new teacher again! I did that last year, and don't want to do it again! And then there is the issue of the class I will be teaching. It is sooo out of my comfort level, and not anything I ever wanted to teach at all. But these kids really do deserve someone who wants to be there which makes it even more frustrating that the Special Ed department would place someone there that absolutely does not want to be there. I have done the self contained class before with a different population of students, but hated it! I was sooo happy last year and now am going into this school year with a sense of dread. I know, I know... you say, why don't you quit, do something else for a year. Well, I've looked at my options, and can't see that any of them are much better. Substituting doesn't bring in enough money, which we need for our new house payment and expenses (last month's electric bill was $600!!!!!). I could go back and work for the state, but I was probably more miserable doing that before and I would lose my summers and other vacation time off, which is the prime reason I became and remane a teacher. The time with my daughter this summer has been awesome and I don't want to give that up. So, I will do what I always do. I will try to be postiive and do what I have to do to get by for the next year. I just needed to vent......